July 16th - London: Jungle Soundclash Final

The first round saw DJ Rap and Kenny ken progress into the finals, at the expense of DJ Younghead and Darren Jay respectively. A month later, round two saw Devious D and the Mickey Finn progress through to the grand final with Danny Breaks and Cool Hand Flex been the unlucky losers.

Tonight, everybody who is anybody is "Ringside" at the Roller Express in Edmonton, north London for the grand final to see who is crowned the first ever Jungle Soundclash Champion. Will it be Devious D or the Mickey Finn?, or will it be DJ Rap or Kenny Ken?. In what is now seen as one of those legendary one-off parties, an incredible ten thousand strong crowd, three times the legal capacity sardined themsleves inside the Roller Express to witness this never-to-be-repeated showdown.

With the party well exceeding it's "legal" capacity, utside the venue there still a couple of thousand ravers still trying to get in!. Some anxious guests waited near the fire exits - if the doors were popped open from the inside, they would be first into the dancehall - for free!. The Roller Express' busiest night ever was also greeted with a severe tailback [ of parked cars ] on the nearby A406 road which has come to the attention of the local police.

Officials from Enfield Borough Council, the London Fire Brigade and the Metropolitian Police turned up unannounced to inspect the venue and they wasn't entirely happy with what they saw. After going around the venue and much deliberation, the authorities decided to let the party carry on rather than closing it down as the staff and security at the venue were in control of this very hectic situation. The authorities also knew they wouldn't be a popular bunch if they shut it down.

Jungle Soundclash has specially installed a full-sized boxing ring for the final, and ringside announcers and comperes are Moose and 5ive-O. After a huge case of hoarse throats [ the organisers have rigged up a special microphone to a bell which orders a "Jack-up" if called for, also a lightbox which calculates the noise from the crowd at the end of the set ] and special guest sets from DJ Hype and DJ Brockie, the final results please.

After coming into the ring, all guns blazing and delivering the knock-out blow that:

With a fight score card of twelve Jack-up's, Kenny Ken is duly voted the first Soundclash Champion!. In amongst all this pandemonium, chaos and noise that the "capacity" crowd provided, DJ Kenny Ken is presented with the Jungle Soundclash Belt which is his "The Heavyweight Champion Of Champions" to keep, forever.

July 16th - Perth: Head